“EVERYBODY needs somebody, some time,” according to the old song, and this is especially true when you move abroad.
A strong support network can provide encouragement, advice, essential resources and a sense of belonging.
You may have moved to a part of France where there are no existing support networks. You can start one yourself with patience, enterprise, and determination.
In order to do this, you may well be stepping outside your comfort zone, but what a great way to become integrated – as well as helping yourself and others.
Having access to a strong support network offers mental, emotional, and physical health benefits, including reduced stress, better sleep, and increased resiliency.
Support networks can also help you achieve your goals and contribute to your overall wellbeing.
List your existing support networks
Initially, you need to work out what support is actually required.
Write down exactly what it is you feel is missing in your community.
Be specific. You must do a thorough study and analysis of what is already in existence, if anything.
The last thing you want to do is to step on somebody else’s toes, or reinvent the wheel.
Assuming that you have carte blanche, are you seeking emotional support, professional guidance, or social support? Your needs should guide your next steps.
Read more: How to cope when the shine comes off your ‘perfect’ new life in France
Be proactive
Reach out to neighbours, acquaintances, and friends of friends to identify potential connections.
Attend community events or social gatherings to meet new people who share your interests. By expanding your social network, you increase your chances of finding the support you need.
Consider, too, the practicalities. Where are you going to meet, for how long and how often?
Is the support going to be self-funded? If so, you need to work out how much you are going to charge. Be patient and proactive in seeking connections and nurturing relationships.
Use social media
Social media can be a valuable tool for expanding your network. In this way, you can connect with people who are on the same wavelength. You can join forums, chat to people and share your experiences.
Social media is often criticised but it is a fantastic way to network, garner information and to ascertain what might work within your own context.
Research websites of community associations which match with your objectives.
Accept invitations
Seek out networks or associations related to your field of interest and be prepared to travel a little in order to try them out.
Every event is an opportunity to grow your network, so do not refuse an invitation without a very good reason for doing so. You just never know who you are going to meet and when.
Offer mutual support. You can do this by sharing resources, asking questions, and remembering to show your appreciation.
It can feel daunting and if you are really anxious, take a friend along with you for support.
When I am nervous about attending new social occasions, I tell myself not to practise contempt prior to investigation!
Give it a go with an open mind and see where the opportunity leads.
Read more: How I got past the disillusionment of everyday life in France
Spread the word
Approach other community-based groups, community centres and your local mairie to tell them what you are doing and to enlist any help they may be willing to give.
Inform your local book club and gym, and ask permission from local shopkeepers to advertise your network. You could also inform your GP and other local healthcare providers.
See everybody you meet as a potential referral source. Be open to meeting new people and establishing connections.
Approach social interactions with a keen interest in others and show kindness, compassion and be a good listener. Being supportive can foster deeper connections and build trust.
Finally, consider letting your local newspaper know of your plans.
Nurture relationships
Seek out others who have started a network. People are generally happy to help and feel flattered when approached.
Once you have found support, put effort into maintaining that relationship. This can give you wonderful insights as to how to grow your support.
Building a network requires effort and nurturing. Regularly check in with your network and maintain open lines of communication. Keep your network fresh and vibrant.
Tips for creating a support network
Building a support network takes time and effort – be patient.
Although rewarding, starting something new is always scary – seek support for yourself.
Take small steps in developing your network, giving your confidence an opportunity to increase.
There is no such thing as “failure” – everything is a learning experience.
Ask people in your locality what they feel is missing in your community.
Remember – if you don’t try – you don’t get!
Cynthia enjoys receiving your emails and feedback and will always endeavour to reply. Please email her at Cynthia.spillman@connexionfrance.com
